One day the Caliph Harun Ar-Rasyid was furious with Abu Nawas. Because of his anger, the Caliph took the initiative to embarrass Abu Nawas and avenge his anger. The Caliph summoned some of his commanders and ordered them to defecate on Abu Nawas’s bed. They obeyed.
When they went to Abu Nawas’s house, it turned out that Abu Nawas was sleeping, and the one who met them was his wife.
“Wake him up! We brought here orders from Amirul Mu’minin,” said one of the commanders who guided the caliph’s orders to Abu Nawas’s wife.
With swiftness Abu Nawas’s wife immediately entered the house and woke him up, and told him that there were several commanders who had come to bring orders from the Caliph.
“Invite them to enter,” ordered Abu Nawas to his wife.
When they entered, Abu Nawas asked, “What do you mean by this coming to my house?”
“Hey Abu Nawas! We have been ruled by Amirul Mu’minin to pollute your bed with our filth,” explained the Commander sternly,
“The Caliph is furious at you,” he continued.
Abu Nawas fell silent, then asked “With big (defecate) or small (urine) filth?”
“The big ones,” said one of the commanders.
“Alright, please! Do what the Caliph commands,” answered Abu Nawas.
“But on one condition.”
“What are the conditions?”
“Wait a minute.”
Abu Nawas went into his room and took a large stick, then Abu Nawas looked at each of their eyes with his smart eyes while saying,
“Please defecate in my bed, provided that no one can urinate in my bed. Whoever urinates in my bed, then it is the same as he rebels the order of the caliph, and who defies the order of the caliph, I will hit his genital with this stick.”
The commanders fell silent. They went home and faced Caliph Harun Ar-Rasyid to report what Abu Nawas said.
“O your majesty the Caliph!”
“How was the expedition?” Asked the Caliph.
“We have come to Abu Nawas to carry out your orders, but when we wanted to carry out your orders, Abu Nawas invites us but by giving conditions.”
“What are the conditions?”
“That those who are allowed to dispose are only big filth, cannot be the small one. How can we be able to defecate without urinating?”
“Hhahahahahaha”
The Caliph can only laugh and shake his head for what Abu Nawas did. Then the caliph Harun Ar-Rasyid ordered his aides to send gifts for the behavior that Abu Nawas had done.
Taken from the book of Abu Nawas Fi Nawadirihi wa Ba’dhaa Qashaidihi.
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